Born Against you

 Once again, 

what started out good and promising,

began to crumble before her. 

Only this time, 

she was willing to accept it for what it was.

Another lie. 

Another deceitful lure 

from her mindset.

Could this be her self sabotage mechanism?

Trying to fool her again to repeat 

the same old tried and true 

false belief pattern?

She was onto it this time though.

And to willingly go along with it was not 

her only option. 

She had finally learned something 

from all the previous times that this same 

situation would happen upon her. 

There was no more running back and forth. 

There was going to be no more giving in

to external demands to throw away 

who she truly was. 

Turning her back on 

Her own gifts.

Her own passions.

Her own desires. 

Giving up on herself 

was no longer a bet she was willing to make.

It was time to rise out of this hole she had fallen into.

It was time to wake up from the deep sleep she had 

lulled away into.

As she looked around her and was ever so 

grateful for all the service workers who were

giving their best efforts at serving 

because it was their passion,

she had realized today, 

that the only reason she could 

never fit in with them, 

even though she could do the job, 

was because she was going in with

 A Lie.

A false sense of self.

A mask. 

And with that, 

she kept repeating in this life 

where everything and everywhere 

she would go, 

it reflected exactly as she was playing it. 

Maybe with the Sun going into Aries today, 

she would do the right thing

for once 

and just be herself.