Real Love

 "Alcohol Dementia"

What exactly was that? 

Her Plutonic twin used to say it to her. 

Often. 

As she sat at her computer 

drinking her Modelo Imported Beer,

she began typing her next destiny.

She kept forgetting where she was. 

Who was she?

Why was life such a battle?

Or was it?

She felt as if she was falling through some sort 

of vortex... 

She reached and grabbed for something 

to stop her from falling,

but there was nothing in sight.

It was all black and dark

endless space.

Just like the abyss. 

Could she be falling?

Still?

When was she going to finally hit ground? 

Or maybe that was it!

Maybe she wasn't supposed to hit the actual gound

of the abyss...

Maybe... 

The ground wasn't outside of her. 

Maybe... 

The ground she was waiting to hit was inside her!

She just needed to come back in.

But why was the door locked?

And where was the key? 

She was always in such a hurry to serve others

that she never actually stopped to check if she had 

grabbed her keys. 

And since she was locked out now,

clearly she had always left without caring. 

While she was out serving others, 

her desires were always locked inside. 

Without a key. 

No wonder she never got anywhere in life. 

She was always separating from herself. 

But rather then going out there with who she was, 

she would lock them in and forget the key.

How was she expecting for this relationship to work?

It was so disconnected!

And stuck.

 

But for how long?

How long had this been going on?

Days? 

Years?

Decades?

Lifetimes?

And then there it was... 

Her past life. 

Her karma. 

Looking her straight in the face. 

"Why don't you love me?"

It said to her. 

"They hate me because of you..."

she replied back. 

"That's a false belief"

said a deep loving voice... 

She looked around but saw no one. 

Except herself and her reflection. 

Could it be that she had turned against herself 

for them?

For those out there!

Out there, out of her reach. 

Who could do as they pleased. 

But never what she needed. 

Always going against her. 

Had her reflection turned against her?

Was her reflection trying to find her in others?

It definitely wasn't going to work that way... 

So what was she to do?

She was locked in a prison.

Or was she? 

Venus was about to conjunct Neptune in Pisces. 

The deep hidden sub-conscious, 

was about to be uncovered!

It was time for the revelation to happen. 

Was she really who she claimed to be? 

Or was there more to her then she allowed 

for others to see. 

Was she playing small?