Magic Seeds

 "Your wish will be granted"!

 Every time she heard those words spoken

something inside her hid.

Most people would jump for joy!

Get excited even.

But not her. 

For her it always felt

as if some dark cloud had come out from no where

and wanted to suck her up in it!

But why?

It's not that she didn't believe in miracles.

Cuz she whole heartedly did.

Miracles were what saved her life up until even this 

very day. 

But so then what was it that kept hiding deep inside her

every time someone said, 

"your wish is being granted".

And this is where she had an ah-Ha! Moment. 

She had been following other people's wishes.

And so each time a wish was indeed granted, 

she could not feel the joy of it. 

This is what her Plutonic twin was reflecting to her

the other day when he said to her,

that no matter how many fights he wins, he doesn't

feel anything. 

But then, what wish would she be happy to see granted?

She honestly didn't know. 

She realized that she had been ignoring her own 

true needs for so long that she hadn't the slightest clue.

Even today, she caught herself running off to 

the pet store to buy her Guinea pig

her favorite treats, yet, when it came to buying 

herself a treat, it was always a no no, there's not enough 

money for that. 

Plus, since she didn't have a job, she wasn't deserving. 

Yet, her Guinea Pig got the Royal Treatment from her.. 

She, on the other hand, 

 was a slave to her Rodent. 

How did this happen?

Could it be a lack of Gratitude for what she already had?

Could it be that she was always so busy 

wanting everyone to clap for her, 

that she overlooked clapping for herself.

That was it!

That was the addiction! 

She made doing things for others the pain relief

for not getting what she wanted.

Her wish.

To be wanted and needed. 

Accepted.

But this was a false belief.

 A false belief that she had to 

do so much for others just to feel accepted and 

of worth. 

Now that she was older and matured, she realized that 

when she needed acceptance and worth, 

it came from within. 

From God.

And from her soul family.

She didn't need to busy herself just to not feel 

the desire she wished for. 

Instead, she could just go to her soul family and 

ask for acceptance,

whenever she wanted and needed. 

And with that, she could send gratitude and really 

mean it cuz she would feel it. 

Wow, what a revelation!

And just in time for the Winter Solstice too!