Free At Last

 As she sat in her chair, she began to understand

everything. 

All of it.

Her Mother and Father.

Her Plutonic Twin.

And all the other craziness in between.

As a child growing up, she perceived things

 the best she could with the little knowledge that was

available to her at that time. 

Which, of course, wasn't much

And Just what exactly did she perceive growing up?

 Well, for one, she saw that her Mother had 

all the Masculine Energy and Drive of a Man.

Whereas Her Father had all the creativity and Understanding

of the Feminine Energy.

Yet, Her Father displayed his Manly role through 

a misuse of his power as a man by being Abusive.

And her Mother displayed her role as a woman

through doing nothing but over working,

cooking, and cleaning

yet with no actual self boundaries. 

So then, 

in the here and now, 

it all started to make sense to her. 

Why she had such a hard time letting go of her 

Plutonic Twin. 

He was exactly like her Father. 

A Male in his Feminine Energy misusing his power

through self abuse and the battling with others.

But she was also battling...

Battling to not be like her mother, 

however, 

by battling...

She realized that she had become exactly that

 which she feared the most!

She was in her Masculine Energy way too much.

Yet, there was one slight discrepancy in hers... 

While her Mother's Masculine Energy had Drive... 

Drive to push everyone off a cliff. 

She on the other hand had little to no drive at all.

But why? 

Could it be that she took on both Energies 

and her mind along with Nessus, the asteroid of self sabotage,

 battled against them both? 

Bada Bing! 

~insert Victory Dance here~

Finally! 

After all these years of self destruction,

 she was finally able to see the truth!

She didn't need to repeat anything. 

She also didn't need to fight against anything.

All she had to do was accept her fears and let 

her parents fears go. 

They were never hers to fix through the repeat patterns

she kept reproducing by holding onto their energies

through regrets and grudges.

She always knew the truth to God's Love. 

She just now had to allow herself to accept it 

whole heartedly from herself. 

It was time to move on up and out

of the ditch she kept throwing herself in.