With Neptune and Mercury gone Retrograde
and then Venus entering Virgo,
she could pretty much do nothing else but
revisit her old relationships and sort out
every minuet detail that made her trip up.
Or down,
depending on which way she was going...
So she took into consideration, all of them.
All of her boy toys and sugar daddies...
First there was Luis...
Luis was an old past life energetic that she couldn't quite
pin, until the final days of yore...
She knew something was dreaded off about him,
But she could never quite get herself to completely
stop it.
She would use him for his money.
However, she was exchanging tons of her energy for a
3 dollar beer.
Every night she regretted staying longer than she should.
He always promised her an Uber, but the entire
night they were hanging out, she was constantly battling his
inappropriate gropes and grabs.
By nights end, she was ready to collapse.
And in the mornings, she felt so sick and tired,
as if she had been battling a life long sickness
and barely lived to wake up.
This guy turned out to be an old energy of
Hades.
And she was Persephone.
Not choosing herself.
But rather letting them choose for her, all because she
believed she was dependent.
The way she had met her next boy toy was almost like
a runaway train...
She was trying to unhinge herself from the
old wrecking train known as Hades,
from the homeless shelter, of all places.
Talk about a Lilith moment revisit!
Pedro was more fun though, from her view point.
He was young and vibrant and cute, not like Luis,
who was bald, old, and bow legged.
Yes, judgmental was her thing...
Quite rightly so, since she was in fact a Pisces...
However, Pedro was an utter mess!
He was arrested for three months, joined a prison gang,
came into America by jumping
the wall,
very very insecure..
Which come to think of it, so was Luis.
Both guys would use the same tactic to try
to stir emotions in her.
Her Aquarius Moon was ice though...
That Hell hath frozen over a long long time ago,
Like a fairytale.
They would both threaten to leave her.
Abandon her..
Go.
Gone.
Poof!
Luis would say,
"I'm going to New York by the end of the month."
And she would say to him,
"Oh how great for you! Good Luck!"
Come the end of the month and he never went.
She was pissed!
But only showed indifference.
Same with Pedro.
He would constantly threaten her with pictures of
other women and say he was going to get with them.
And when she said to him,
"Okay, I hope it's all that you wish for."
He would then come back and call her the next day
as if he never said it.
She was Disgusted,
But showed only apathy.
What was wrong with these men?
But then it hit her!
The iron Pan from
Venus in Virgo!
"Girl! What is wrong with you!?" Said Venus.
"Don't you know that indifference ain't going to get you
anywhere new?
Two jerks already gave you the chance...
Take it!"
Venus wasn't having any more of this back and forth crap.
She scratched her head...
Ouch...
But Venus was on to something...
Why didn't she cut off these jerks as soon as they tried to come back?
Why did she let them back after a lie?
A deceptive lie?
Oooohhhh!
And there it was...
She was using them...
This wasn't a real thing...
She was playing men still to this day all because
she was afraid to be in a relationship.
She was afraid to open up to connection.
So she kept using her fears to attract guys whom from the
get go she knew she didn't even like.
She just wanted to use them for whatever she could
get from them.
Take take take...
But only give her body...
Why?
Cuz she had no soul.
She sold it a long time ago.
It was time for her to give it up...
This demon
And lay her head to rest.
Rest in Peace.
Was it really going to be that simple though?
She was 48 years old and this all had been going back
and forth since she was 4 years old...
Don't leave me!
RUN!
Chase!
Beg!
Plead!
But now Venus in Virgo wasn't going to let her
continue.
It was time for her to stop.
To Be Continued...
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